Wednesday, 17 October 2007

People from History I would like to have a Beer with.


People from history I would like to have a few beers with and sort out a couple of questions:
Julius Caesar. He would be my first choice. He was known not to be a heavy drinker, but I am sure he would be partial to a good bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon. The conversation would include a discussion on the Rubicon fiasco, which ultimately lead to his demise. I would also want to know if he really said “e tu Brute” when stabbed by Brutus, or did Shakespeare think that one up. Clarification on whether flush toilets were invented yet and the protocols and requirements for a good Roman orgy, would be discussed in detail.

Albert Einstein. High on the list. If I was able to communicate with him I would like to know if he could change a light bulb or button up his shirt properly. What would his comments be on the Climate Change scenario? What would he see as the next level of weapons of mass destruction? Also a bottle of wine for this occasion, a good Grand Crux.

Napoleon would also be on the list. A bottle of brandy would most probably be appropriate. First thing I would ask is why his hand was always tucked in under his shirt. Serious indigestion? (Would check out to see if he was really as short as they say). Did he really say “not tonight Josephine”, as viagra had not been discovered?, or is that why his hand was always under his jacket?

Leonardo da Vinci. A must. Red Bull and Vodka to get the conversation going. Who the hell was Mona Lisa, was she real? (That painting is priceless, best valuation I could get on the Net was 175 million US).
Did aliens help him with his inventions? If he had battery or an internal combustion engine what else would he have invented.

Sigmund Freud. This would not be a friendly conversation. A bottle of plonk, no hard tack here, he would most probably run off and tell his Mom. I would explain to him that he made my life hell. My X majored in Psychology and his theories were rammed down my throat every time we had an argument, and there were many. I had no desire to have my father killed, and I loved my mother as any son does. And by the way, Oedipus, did not have any of the emotions as defined in your theory.

Christopher Columbus. A bottle of Rum, a good one. This would be a long conversation. Who was he? Nobody really seems to know. More books written about whom he was not that who he was. Did he really believe he had found the East?

Duty calls, there are a few more, but they will have to wait

3 comments:

moooooog35 said...

This differs greatly from my list of historical figures:

1) Shemp from the 3 Stooges: Did he feel more important than Curley, or more like a 4th wheel?

2) Inventor of pornography: Whoever it was...just to say thank you

3) Shakespeare: Just to ask him if all that I learned in English class about his symbolism in his stories was really there...or if he was just writing a story and we made up all of that extra stuff

I noticed you came by my site. Thanks for the visit.

Graham said...

I like it....
The shakespeare one I had in mind as well.

Chic Girl said...

Oh Cleopatra would be mine! I would also like to speak to Alexandra the Czarina of Russia.